"In the last few days, my friend Cronda caught up with me again. (I have Crohn's disease and I'll tell you about it soon). Usually, in the spring, he wants to talk a lot. We chat for a while, then he starts yelling at me and getting aggressive. I search for words, I search for the right foods to suppress the intense pain, I search for inner peace, I search for peace. I won. Not as I imagined my victory, but it's there. Peace has been declining in all possible languages lately. The word war, the word that nobody wants to hear, let alone experience. The situation that has been escalating in recent days, and nobody knows what new news will wake up with, is absolutely incomprehensible, even absurd.
After school, we go to try out a new playground. Where the mother of a classmate whom Elinka likes appears. They are excited to have met. They cheer on all sides, chase each other, swing, laugh carefree. Unknowingly about what is happening in the world. Like most American families sitting on the benches with me. I'm heading towards the mother to introduce myself, and after a few minutes of conversation, she asks me where I'm from. A very common question here. I'm from the Czech Republic. Hmm, the woman shakes her head. I try to guide her. Prague? No. Czechia. No? Czechoslovakia. No, sorry. Is It Russia? Sorry, I don't know Europe. I'm so angry that they throw us into the same bag. Just now a bag of war.
I have bad dreams all night. I toss and turn. I check on Eli and cover her. My head hurts. My heart is pounding fast. I feel all those negative emotions around me. I am sad. I read a message from my angel on my phone: You can't control what's happening around you, but you can change how you feel, what you do, and how your day will be. 💜Vuki hugs me and goes to work. In a while, Elinka wakes up and comes running to me in bed with her teddy bear to cuddle. She tells me, "Mommy, you're the best parent in the world. Do you know why? Because you make me the best food. And you have beautiful eyes." She takes my face in her little hands and looks at me intently. "Mommy, they're blue, gray, green, and wow, they're as colorful as a rainbow. That's why you're my unicorn mommy." And I feel so good. Family is the most important. Love is the most important. The bond is the most important. Now is the most important. Even though we all experience our pains in some way, love heals everything. Even today's world.
With love,
Your Sweetest Dot."
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